For me, accepting my husband’s name when we got married was a no-brainer. First it sounded exotic, and was what one would expect from someone with my husband’s unusually colored eyes. It was also shorter than my maiden name and easier to spell. That a Chinese name was bestowed upon someone as far from being Chinese as snow peas are from well---black-eyed peas, in itself was part of the cache for me. Yet, its brevity for some reason still causes problems. For instance, people always look for more letters to follow, even after I am forced to spell it multiple times. It garners many pronunciations, inspires jokes and quips. Lame remarks like Golly Gee or Gee Whiz abound. Yeah, like I have never heard those before. 

The taking of the husband’s name is a Western tradition that dates back from the time that a married woman had no legal identity or rights separate from those of her husband. However, some women opt to keep their maiden names. With a wall filled with degrees and with years of accomplishments in tow, women feel comfortable keeping the name that they have worked so hard to earn. Feminism aside, today’s women feel freer to kick off the the shackles of tradition along with their sensible shoes. Others combine their maiden name with their married one. To hyphenate or not, is a personal matter best left up individual couples. As a rule women hyphenate: men generally do not, although, I do know a couple of men who have added a dash between their names.

Alas, Americans love their made up names. Actors and entertainers are high (pun intended) on this list. Fifty Cents and Denzel spring to mind. As does rappers–turned actors, Ice-Cube and Ice-Tea. A name says something about who we are, and some cultures even have naming ceremonies, a joyous occasion where the newborn is introduced to others in the community who vow to watch over and nurture it. 
Seriously, is just me, or have African Americans cornered the market with made up names? On the one hand I can understand it. Stripped of so much of what other nationalities take for granted, many have felt forced to reinvent themselves. However, some combinations of consonants and syllables should never be used together to name a child. Nor should the sounds that silverware, pots or other objects hitting the floor. That is just so wrong on so many levels. As you have not lived until you have met Shaquanna Lasheniqua Robinson or Velveeta (isn’t that a cheese) Sheneequa Jenkins. And don’t mispronounce or misspell these names unless you want to experience some serious neck rolling on the part of the offended party.

Still, like so many African Americans I proudly embrace my ethnic moniker. And yes I’ve even uttered one or more of the quips to help people understand its pronunciation and spelling. No longer am I offended at folk’s surprise when they meet me and discover that I am not who the name suggests. You see I know who I am and darn proud of it!